When I shared this book at Rutherford Writers Ink, a writer's group in Tennessee, they were quite concerned about the ending.
Well, here is how it goes:
DOGgone Kid
Eleven-year-old Hinder Thornblats reads a sad sign.
LOST Beloved Lab. 8002 Small Elm St.
Large Reward.
Wow! A Large Reward!Hinder could buy snails, an Australian Grump Toad, eels,
a room-size aquarium and invite over Shelia Truklegate.
Oh yeah, and also get a goldfish.
So, Hinder searches and finds the dog sitting by a house
on Average Maple St.
Even though Hinder is no bigger than a sideways tick,
he carries the big dog to the rightful owner.
Hinder knocks on the door of 8002 Small Elm St.
A Mr., Mendel Fratmender answers and says,
“Sorry Kid, but that’s not my dog.”
He pats them on their heads and sends them on their way.
It’s plain to see that Mendel Fratmender is not an honest man.
But, Hinder so wanted that Large Reward.
He could buy an antler guitar, massive amplifier, and give
Miranda Spungen and other wanna-be girlfriends tickets
to his concert. Oh yeah, and also buy a slick guitar pick.
So, Hinder searches and finds the dog catching a Frisbee on
Giant Evergreen Ave. Even though Hinder is no bigger than a
drool, he carries the best to the rightful owner.
Hinder knocks on the door of 8002 Small Elm St.
Mr. Mendel Fratmender answers and says,
“Sorry Kid, that’s not her.”
He pats the dog on the head and sends them on their way.
It’s obvious that Fratmender is cheap.
But, he soo wanted that reward. He could buy a Fedstick
Tennis racquet, hire a famous coach, and give Byrenna Glinka
and other should-be girlfriends tickets to his match.
Oh yeah and he could also get a cloth headband.
Soo, Hinder searches and finds Fratmender’s dog cooling
in a pool on Lean Hackberry St.
Hinder is not bigger than a sideways dog-tag, but he carries
the beloved to the rightful owner.
Hinder knocks on the door of 8002 Small Elm St.
Fratmender answers, “Sorry Kid, that is not my Dog.”
He sends them on their way.
It’s obvious Fratmender is a miser. But Hinder sooo wanted that
reward. He could buy a NASA-propelled two-tiered
Techno Scooter perfectly built for he and Flavia Domachowski.
Oh yeah, and he could sport a flag.
Sooo, Hinder searches and finds the dog chained right outside
Balmy’s Drug Store on Stout Cedar Blvd.
Hinder is no bigger than a silent growl, but he carries
the down-trodden to the rightful owner.
Hinder knocks on the door of 8002 Small Elm St.
Fratmender gasps, “Sorry Kid, Not Even Close!” and closes the door.
It’s obvious that Fratmender is a fraud.But Hinder soooo wanted that reward. He could build a castle
and invite over a friendly dragon and Rebeena Zucker, if she
stopped liking ugly Herman Faust.
Oh yeah, and he could also weild a sword.
Soooo, Hinder searches and finds the dog barking behind a fence on Scrawny Poplar Ave. Hinder is no bigger than a backward flea, but he carries the lost soul to the rightful owner.
Hinder knocks on the door of 8002 Small Elm St.
and patiently waits for his Large Reward.
Fratmender says, “Sorry Kid, that’s Zohereh Matharifard’s dog
that lives on the other side of that fence and slams the door.
It’s obvious that Fratmender has ill intentions.
But he sooooo wanted that reward.
He could buy miles of peanut brittle to mold into an award-
winning sculpture honoring Jill Srebotnik’s beauty.
Oh yeah, and he really wants a tall glass of lemonade.
Sooooo, Hinder searches and finds that they are just giving away
Fratmender’s dog at the mall on Plump Mulberry St.
Hinder is no bigger than a slow scratch, yet he carries
the wanderer to the rightful owner.
Hinder knocks on the door of 8002 Small Elm St.,
and waits for a long time.
Fratmender growls, “No, no, no, Kid, that’s just a puppy.”
It’s obvious that Fratmender is plain rude.
But Hinder soooooo wanted that reward. He could buy 5,000 of the
latest frightening alien games and invite over Hiromi Nakamoto.
Oh yeah, and he'd need a second controller.
Hinder sits on the curb, perplexed. And just his bad luck,
he sees that the police have arrested Frat mender’s dog.
All his dreams are over.
But wait one minute! There’s Lucy Houbert’s mother walking Fratmender’s dog.
Hinder is no bigger than a claw, but he unleashes
the little darling and carries him to 8002 Small Elm St.
Hinder knocks on the door and patiently waits for his reward.
Fratmender yells, “DOGgone Kid! That's a white Poodle!”
It’s obvious that Mrs. Houbert and Fratmender are not nice people.
But Hinder sooooooo wanted the reward. He could pay a body guard
to intimidate bullies on the first day of sixth grade, and call a
stretch limousine to pick up Carlie Lissel and other could-be girlfriends.
Oh yeah, he needs a cool pair of dark sunglasses.
Sooooooo, he searches and finds the dog just sitting on a table at the
Sinewy Ash Street Country Club Dog Show.
Hinder is no bigger than pedigree paper, but he
snags the loser and carries him back to the rightful owner.
Hinder knocks on the door of 8002 Small Elm St. and waits for his reward.
Fratmender rubs his eyes and weeps,
“Dog Gone Kid, I’ll take that dog and we’ll be done with this.”
He hands Hinder ten dollars for all his trouble.
Ten Dollars? What can he possibly buy with ten dollars?
He works hard at pondering the possibilities.
Well, he could buy a small bag of food for that hungry-looking
dog digging in the garbage. Oh yeah, he could also buy a leash.
Twelve-year-old Hinder Thornblats reads a sad sad sign.
Lost. Darling Cat 934 Hasty Marsh.
Big Reward.
Now that he made Fratmender happy, he could
make the rest of the world happy.
The End
The woman at the writer's meeting Gasped,
"You mean he doesn't get his dog back? And it says Beloved Lab!"
Turns out, Fratmender is actually happier with the loser showdog, and Hinder has a new best friend and the lab is still beloved.
Anyway, this is of course, a trilogy. Possibly a double trilogy.
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